Posted by: Hope | March 27, 2010

In A Slump

A few weeks ago now I went to Italy to visit Jason. It was an amazing trip! I loved my time there, especially my time spent with Jason. We really had a good time together, and I hope to go back and see him very soon.

Sadly, shortly after our trip, Jason and I broke up. Strange, I know. I won’t go into details because it’s mostly between him and I, but I assume letting you know that shouldn’t be too big of a deal for him.

Whether or not we get back together, at this point…I’m really not sure. I’d love to, but I’m not sure he’s willing to jump back into anything. Not now, at least. Me, being a silly person, has insisted that I will not move on. I don’t know if it’s a good idea or not. But…well…I love him. I don’t want to be with anyone else. I suppose I’m willing to make such a sacrifice as to wait until he’s ready. Whenever that is, I don’t know. But I hate the thought of being with him as his “last resort.” It’s sad, that I even have to think about it like that. Who knows, maybe we’ll just be friends, maybe our friendship will fade away, or maybe we’ll fall in love with each other and live the rest of our lives together. I don’t know.

School isn’t really going very well right now. I’m overwhelmed, stressed, and slightly depressed. That combination leaves me doing quite poorly in a lot of my classes. I’m not sure how to react to this situation, but I need to start busting my tail if I want to pass my classes…without an F.  I’ve met with a few of my professors to work out ideas on how to work through this, and work together on solutions so I do not fail. We’ll see. Hopefully I don’t. I really don’t want to retake a few of these classes. They’re horrible classes.

That’s all that’s going on here. Nothing special. Nothing interesting. Mostly depressing. I kind of hate my life right now.

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