Posted by: Hope | October 24, 2007

I’m a Jesus hater?

Those of you that know me, know my basic Christian background..but for those that don’t we’ll start there.

I was a Christian for almost 3 to 4 years. I was pretty devout and was really big on evangelism, especially to my close friends from school. A lot of my friends knew me as their “Christian buddy” and I was just fine with that! But today, 4 almost 5 years later I am no longer a Christian and call myself an Agnostic (with a twist). Not many of my friends are aware of this and I try to keep it kind of hush hush…mostly because I hate that very simple question: “Why?” That one question is such a huge question but is only one word. I can’t explain why, for the most part. I mean..I could tell you that I have issues with hell among other things, but that doesn’t fully answer the question as to why I’m agnostic. I don’t have a complete answer for that and most people are completely unwilling to accept that! Even I struggle with the fact that I do not know.

But all of that is not what I wanted to share with you. What I wanted to share with you was the rudeness and uncaring hearts that I have gotten from Christians. Do you want to know what was said to me the other day? Not by just one person, but three. When these friends of mine heard that I was an agnostic the first thing they said to me was “Jesus hater!” When I heard those words I had to pause. I was shocked. Who says that? How COULD someone say that to anyone? How is that loving at all? These people call themselves my friend, yet they don’t even stop to think about what they’re saying?

So obviously, my first response was to be shocked. My second response was to be offended. I honestly think I’m still going through my third response, three days later. My third response is pondering how to handle such a statement, and I’m left wondering if they understand the ignorance of their statement?

I am left asking why they would say that. I still don’t have an answer. Were they offended that I do not believe in their God? That I think their God does no exist? Is that it…is that why they had the audacity to say such a thing? Maybe it is and if so, does that give them to say such a thing? Well, no I don’t think so. What if I were offended because theists say that I am wrong, my beliefs are incorrect. I’m not offended by that, it’s clearly common sense that they believe that…but if I were offended by that, would that give me the right to be a complete asshole to them? To say such a rude comment? Absolutely not, its completely unethical. No one has the right to be rude.

Maybe I’m just complaining/whining over the fact that people that are supposed to be my friends could say something so harmful. I don’t hate Jesus, I just don’t believe he’s god. Actually, I wouldn’t even go so far as to say that. I truly, honestly DO NOT know what I believe. I’m so confused. I’ve said this for months. I’ve been back and forth with Christianity a thousand times the last year or so. It got ridiculous and I was sick of it so I went with my gut feeling: there is no God.

I feel as off I am getting off track. I’m unaware of which direction I want to take this from here, so I feel I should end this. Why are agnostics and atheists looked at as such bad people? I recently posted a topic on that, so I wont go into that. But why do Christians say they are getting attacked and that America is becoming an atheist, agnostic (ok not all christians, but I’ve heard them) nation when we are the minority!

I could ramble on and on, but I feel no point. I wish people would learn to respect other peoples view and quit being so rude. America is a country where we are allowed to have our freedom of religion and not be hassled over that decision. If you are offended because I am agnostic I don’t understand why. Want to inform me?

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Responses

  1. Yes we are living in a country where we have freedom of religion, and along with that freedom of speech. Unfortunately, people can take their words and use them to hurt people. That isn’t always their goal, but sometimes it happens. A lot of people of faith believe very strongly that you are either black or white, meaning you either love ‘God’ or hate him. As you and I know, this just isn’t true, at least not all of the time. Maybe when your friends lash out at you like this you should reevaluate your relationship with them. They may be Christian people, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that they are good friends. A good friend will accept you as you are. I am not trying to insult your friends. Honestly. But if you are happy with you and your beliefs, they should be too.

  2. Most churches work best when everyone agrees. If you aren’t agreeing then you are making it difficult for your friends. You force them to question thier faith which is uncomfortable. It is unfortunate what they said to you.

  3. God is love and so is his anointing, and things said to you that are not loving do not come from God.

    Just think for yourself, as you obviously are,and the love of God will make himself known to you when you are ready.

    You sound like a great person. Good to know you.

  4. I disagree with curtismchale; I don’t think you are forcing your friends to question their faith at all, and I don’t think you are making things difficult. In my experience, many young people who consider themselves Christians simply have a very exclusivist, black and white view of the world.

    I consider myself a religious person (though not strictly a Christian anymore), and this weekend when a formerly religious friend of mine told me he now considers himself to be agnostic, I accepted it as his own personal realization. If your friends attack you because you no longer believe as they do, then maybe you should try talking to them in depth about your newfound agnosticism. If they still don’t accept you, then no offense, but I agree with bri683’s suggestion that you reevaluate your relationships with them. I do hope, though, that everything works out between you and your friends; it’s never good when people are torn apart because of religious or philosophical differences.

  5. you can only imagine how much fun it gets if you, years later, decide to return to christianity and end up around the same people still.

    i’ve learned… sometimes, with large changes, its better to change your associates as well. that, and find more tender hearted ones.

  6. I’ve gotten a lot of grief too about how I don’t believe in “God” from my religious friends. It really hurts when my own close friends tell me that I’m “going to hell” because I don’t believe in God.

    I don’t believe in any gods at all but fully respect other people’s choice to believe or not, as long as they don’t start bible bashing me.

  7. Please don’t base your understanding of Christianity on people. I agree that what Christians have said to you is hurtful but i really hope that you do not give up your faith. God is amazing, he will change your life! The only reason that Christians tend to be over evangelistic is because they are so excited about finally grasping the truth! Do you ever wonder what the point of life is, whats our purpose? Why are we here? Do you want to know the truth? The truth is that there is a God who loves you unconditionally he longs for you to love him back. We live in a world of sin and Christians might treat you badly and act in an immoral way, people will let you down but God will always be there for you! You don’t know what your missing, because giving your life to Jesus will be the best decision you ever make!
    Believe me.


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